I'm In A Relationship With My Anxiety
I’m in a relationship with my anxiety. It’s been my longest relationships yet. She gives me butterflies in my stomach every time she comes around. I mean, she makes me stick to my stomach every time she comes around. We have a love-hate relationship with each other. She hates leaving me and, I love to be left alone.
We talk all through the night and into the morning. At times she’s a little possessive. Doesn’t like when I get distracted by nice things, or nice people, or even nice thoughts. She ruins them by reminding me of everything that could go wrong. She’s also really into nagging. Constantly reminding me of possible situations that could hurt me, constantly reminding me everyone hates me, constantly reminding me that it’s better if I just stay quiet. Sometimes, when she comes around I’m not exactly sure what she wants, she just likes to be present.
She’s a lot to handle. She controls when I eat, how much I eat, when I sleep, how much I sleep. She sometimes takes control of my entire body. She overpowers me. She takes me to physically shaking to the tears falling from my eyes. Sometimes it lasts twenty minutes, but sometimes it takes me a while to gain my control back.
I try to get rid of her, but no matter what she just keeps coming back.
I’ve tried cutting her out, but she’s really into feeling pain so she just eggs me on. I’ve tried taking pills to forget her, but those never last. She always likes to flood back in and take back the little control that I’ve gained.
She’s always talking about depression and how we should start hanging out with him more. I hate hanging out with depression, he makes me feel trapped. He never wants to do anything but lay in bed all day. They like to gang up on me. Beat me down till I’m nothing but the scars that they left on me. Every day it’s a battle with them, and sometimes I don’t always win.
When I find someone new I hope he’s into open relationships. The last guy I was with didn’t like the fact that he wasn’t the only one fucking me over.
We talk all through the night and into the morning. At times she’s a little possessive. Doesn’t like when I get distracted by nice things, or nice people, or even nice thoughts. She ruins them by reminding me of everything that could go wrong. She’s also really into nagging. Constantly reminding me of possible situations that could hurt me, constantly reminding me everyone hates me, constantly reminding me that it’s better if I just stay quiet. Sometimes, when she comes around I’m not exactly sure what she wants, she just likes to be present.
She’s a lot to handle. She controls when I eat, how much I eat, when I sleep, how much I sleep. She sometimes takes control of my entire body. She overpowers me. She takes me to physically shaking to the tears falling from my eyes. Sometimes it lasts twenty minutes, but sometimes it takes me a while to gain my control back.
I try to get rid of her, but no matter what she just keeps coming back.
I’ve tried cutting her out, but she’s really into feeling pain so she just eggs me on. I’ve tried taking pills to forget her, but those never last. She always likes to flood back in and take back the little control that I’ve gained.
She’s always talking about depression and how we should start hanging out with him more. I hate hanging out with depression, he makes me feel trapped. He never wants to do anything but lay in bed all day. They like to gang up on me. Beat me down till I’m nothing but the scars that they left on me. Every day it’s a battle with them, and sometimes I don’t always win.
When I find someone new I hope he’s into open relationships. The last guy I was with didn’t like the fact that he wasn’t the only one fucking me over.
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